Pokemon Crystal

by Chorocojo

Part 24

Alright Morty! I-

But I-

...
Well what else is in this town.

That means Morty is probably inside.

Oh god it smells like charmander poo in here.

The trail of what now?

I-

How do people keep doing that?!

You know it's not that big of a tower.

....never heard of em.

Well why not stay in the gym so I can fight you so I can go look in that tower?
Meh, I should just wander around until he gets bored.

Wait, L.15?
Raticate #020

Rat Pokémon
Height: 2'04" Weight: 40.8 lbs
Habitat: Grasslands Types: Normal
Stage 1: Evolves from Rattata
Raticate's sturdy fangs grow steadily. To keep them ground down, it gnaws on rocks and logs. It may even chew on the walls of houses. Its rear feet have three toes each. They are webbed, enabling it to swim across rivers. It uses its whiskers to maintain its balance. If they are cut off, Raticate become hesitant to run.

Uh oh.. That's not.. Ok Roxy, just sneak by slowly... maybe he won't hear you and won't punch you in the teeth...

Crap in a hat.

Yeah, I was just leaving. PLEASE DON'T PUNCH ME

How did everyone but me hear about this? <>

I caught a Raticate.

Oh god wh-

BUT I-

Honeypot this might n-

Ok yeah.

Oh god what happened to the cute little chikorita...

Owls. Dinosaurs' greatest enemies.

Told ya.

What is that? It's kinda cute.. but metal? Let's hit it with rocks.

KNEEL BEFORE THE AWESOMENESS.

:I

So violent it blurs reality!

Wait, what?

Yeah you're probably right...

Well I-

...well shit.

I fell and hurt my butt.

Eh?

Oh god they're scary.

...meep

Oh god the yellow one.

Oh god the red one.

Oh god the bl-

....
....
....
....
OH GOD DON'T EAT MY FACE.

I need to change pants.

I didn't dig one.

My butt still hurts.

Wait that was Suicune?

Oh god my butt.

Its eyes were piercing. PIERCING I SAY.

Hahahaha, hope you have Repels.

Long sort of saga to this one that is funnier if you just see me screaming like an idiot in IRC...

CHAT LOGS AHOY!

#pokegoons posted:

[00:21] RedChocobo: OH
[00:21] RedChocobo: SHIT
[00:21] RedChocobo: WHAT
[00:21] RedChocobo: Wild WEEZING appeared!
[00:21] Silhouette: YEAH
[00:21] GSGold: get it get it get it get it
[00:22] Silhouette: catch dat shizz
[00:23] RedChocobo: FUCK
[00:23] RedChocobo: IT BROKE OUT
...
[00:24] RedChocobo: FUCK
[00:25] RedChocobo: STAY IN THR BALL
...
[00:26] RedChocobo: oh my god my heart
[00:26] RedChocobo: tackle
[00:26] RedChocobo: crit hit
[00:26] RedChocobo: left with 1 HP
...
[00:29] RedChocobo: FUCK
[00:29] RedChocobo: IT KEEPS ESCAPING
...
[00:29] RedChocobo: I only have 4 great balls left
[00:29] RedChocobo: 3
...
[00:30] Kuraineko: hold B and it'll always work!!!!
[00:30] RedChocobo: doin dis
[00:30] RedChocobo: KURAINEKO YOU FAILED ME FOR THE LAST TIME
...
[00:30] RedChocobo: 2 gballs left
[00:31] RedChocobo: FUCK
[00:31] RedChocobo: FUCK YOU WEEZING
...
[00:31] RedChocobo: WHOSE IDEA WAS IT FOR "THREE SHAKES LOL ESCAPE"
...
[00:31] Kuraineko: these balls arent so great, are they?
[00:31] RedChocobo: FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK
[00:31] RedChocobo: I am out of G Balls :<
[00:31] Kuraineko: .....
[00:31] Kuraineko: got any pokeballs?
[00:32] RedChocobo: no |:<
[00:32] RedChocobo: LURE BALL GO
[00:32] Kuraineko: hahaha
[00:32] RedChocobo: omg what
[00:32] RedChocobo: what
[00:32] Kuraineko: ......
[00:32] RedChocobo: what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what what
[00:32] Kuraineko: HAHAHAHAHA
[00:32] Kuraineko: it didnt
[00:32] GSGold: HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAH
[00:32] RedChocobo: Gotcha! Weezing was caught!
[00:32] GSGold: ahahahahahahaha oh jesus
[00:32] Kuraineko: weezing is obviously a fish

So yeah.

Weezing #110

Poison Gas Pokémon
Height: 3'11" Weight: 21 lbs
Habitat: Urban Types: Poison
Stage 1: Evolves from Koffing
Very rarely, a sudden mutation can result in two small Koffing twins becoming conjoined as a Weezing.
Weezing alternately shrinks and inflates its twin bodies to mix together toxic gases inside. The more the gases are mixed, the more powerful the toxins become. The Pokémon also becomes more putrid. Weezing loves the gases given off by rotted kitchen garbage. This Pokémon will find a dirty, unkempt house and make it its home. At night, when the people in the house are asleep, it will go through the trash. Ironically, top-grade perfume is made using its internal poison gases by diluting them to the highest level.

Ok, NOW we can fight Morty...After I go change pants.